WCCM Benedictine Oblates are encouraged to read a designated portion of the Rule daily, and to write a brief, personal response. I hope that this blog will support our Oblate community in this practice. Please, keep blog entries brief and in a first-person ("I") voice. Refrain from discussing, offering an opinion, or commenting on other entries. Simply consider how a particular section of the Rule is speaking to you in your present circumstances.
The further explanation of exclusion of one who is guilty of serious faults continues in this chapter. Just as the guilty party in this chapter is going through the painful process of being stripped of associations, my ego is being stripped of the distractions of desire, possessiveness and social reinforcement through meditation. This chapter can be viewed by me as a description of self-willed exclusion through meditation from the swirl of activities in which I find myself. Can I see with a positive light that meditation is a time to become aware of what might be holding me back from joyful self-giving to the group? “Taking heart” in the “power that resides in my(the)heart”, when I open myself to it, which is the “same power that God exercised in Christ when he raised Him from the dead” (John Main, Daily Readings, November 1), I am encouraged through faith that I am not alone nor am I excluded. There is a greater power helping me
The further explanation of exclusion of one who is guilty of serious faults continues in this chapter.
ReplyDeleteJust as the guilty party in this chapter is going through the painful process of being stripped of associations, my ego is being stripped of the distractions of desire, possessiveness and social reinforcement through meditation. This chapter can be viewed by me as a description of self-willed exclusion through meditation from the swirl of activities in which I find myself. Can I see with a positive light that meditation is a time to become aware of what might be holding me back from joyful self-giving to the group? “Taking heart” in the “power that resides in my(the)heart”, when I open myself to it, which is the “same power that God exercised in Christ when he raised Him from the dead” (John Main, Daily Readings, November 1), I am encouraged through faith that I am not alone nor am I excluded. There is a greater power helping me
Trying to raise two teen-agers taught me the real meaning of “tough
ReplyDeletelove” and "excommunication”. About twenty years ago now, I saw no
alternative but to kick our incorrigible 16-year-old son out of the house
because of his out-of-control behavior. Others in our Toughlove
parents’ group, however, surprised me when they said they “could not
support that.” “We do not believe in kicking our kids out: a healthy
alternative is always found”, they said, citing one of their
organizational principles. The healthy alternative here, for me as well
as for him, it turned out, was for me to give up expecting that he would
listen to reason, that is, to my “reason” and reasoning. My
communication efforts were flawed. First of all I had to turn around
180 degrees. I had to “ex-communicate” him, stop trying to
“communicate” with him. At the same time, I had to learn to
communicate and reach out to and learn how to utilize outside help.
My ego did not like this, especially since I was a professional family
therapist myself. I had to learn that tough love is called “tough” not
because it means being tough on a loved one. It is tough because it
means being tough on myself, it means confronting how much of my
pride, grown-up arrogance and ego-centricity can be involved in my
alleged efforts to love a “problem child”.